my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
