On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
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