Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize
