Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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