You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Damn victory sex feels great
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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