oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Randomize
