i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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