If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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