have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
