We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
