I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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