i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
I am spending my child support on dildos
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
