I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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