OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Randomize
