Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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