I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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