Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I intend to get homeless drunk
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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