I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
