apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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