when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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