I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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