hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Someone came in the potted fern
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize
