i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
