Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Randomize
