WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
