I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
