I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
