READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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