Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Randomize
