If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Randomize
