Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
