I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
