i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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