I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
