you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize
