that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
