If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
