Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
