I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
