You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
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