idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Randomize
