and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
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