Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
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