I think I just saw someone hide a body.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
do herpes really smell.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
