i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
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