Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
God gave him joint rollers for hands
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
