I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
