Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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