sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
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