Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Randomize
