I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
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