Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
