I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
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